‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap: The Girl On Fire

Daenerys Targaryen always waits until the final moments of an episode to demonstrate her actual powers and don those ‘deal with it’ sunglasses. There was an undeniable feminist thrill in seeing her utterly destroy the macho men who seconds earlier had laughed in her face and threatened to gang-rape her — especially as the head priestess of the Dosh Khaleen looked on impassively. But it’s worryingly inescapable that Dany seems to require an awestruck brown audience (give or take a cocksure Daario Naharis and an old, weary and increasingly stoned Ser Friendzone) for each spectacular act she performs with her lily-white body. She may have sympathised with that young former khaleesi, and talked big to Missandei that the fatalism of valar morghulis doesn’t apply to them, as “we are not men”. But only Dany may truly fly free of the system. Missandei is now stuck in Meereen being slavesplained to by Tyrion, who was basically only a slave for an afternoon (more on that later). This was an episode in which women step up, where men are reticent, where sisters lead their wimpy brothers, and where redheads smoulder… like Ygritte, the original girl kissed by fire. (Speaking of, I will never tire of looking at pictures of Kit Harington and Rose Leslie gazing lovingly at one another.) There were three bittersweet sibling reunions this episode. In the first, the High Sparrow finally allows the incarcerated Margaery to see her brother in order to emphasise that she can help the utterly broken and hopeless Ser Loras by confessing her “sins”. Unmoved by the High Sparrow’s ‘Christmas Shoes’-style tale of religious awakening, Margaery is not about to do any such thing.

However, her hapless teen husband Tommen has played right into the High Sparrow’s hands by blabbing to his mum — just as the High Sparrow knew he would — about the “secret” that Margaery is scheduled for her own Walk of Atonement. Much as Cersei would love to see her Highgarden-and-mighty rival humiliated (“You don’t like Margaery, do you?” Tommen finally realises — oh, little buddy!), she sees Margaery’s walk as the perfect time for a military strike against the Sparrows. ‘The Rains of Castamere’ echoes menacingly in the background as Cersei and Jaime stride decisively into the Small Council chamber. For once they seem to have some political agency as they propose their plot to Uncle Kevan and the Queen of Thorns (who doesn’t care how many people die in a civil war, as long as it’s them, not us). Now, I love Olenna Tyrell’s sass as much as anyone, but her ruling-class arrogance underlines why so many smallfolk have flocked to the Sparrows. Of course the Faith Militant will have anticipated Cersei’s trap; as the High Sparrow plainly told Margaery, these characters’ dynastic loyalties have made them shortsighted. They’re setting themselves up for a total bloodbath. Meanwhile at Pyke, Yara Greyjoy has never seemed more like her father as she greets Theon severely in the gloomy hall. To Yara, Theon is a complete fuckup who fumbles every ball that’s thrown to him, and she’s not about to let him ruin her bid for the throne at the forthcoming kingsmoot. Of course, it’s pointless to expect cod-medieval Hobbesian fantasy characters to be sympathetic to the idea of post-traumatic stress. Poor Theon struggles to communicate to his sister that he’s only broken because Ramsay broke him, but Yara can’t deal with his sobs.

 All her life she’s stayed afloat in this misogynistic culture by purging any signs of ‘feminine’ weakness from herself, so it galls her that some ironborn might still see Theon as a better heir to Pyke than her, just because he’s male. Even without a dick. Even though he’s a quivering, tear-stained mess. Her cruelty to him masks her own systemic vulnerability and frustration. Hopefully the kingsmoot will give both Greyjoy siblings some dignity. At the Wall, Sansa and Jon share a truly epic hug as they become the first two Stark siblings to cross paths since season one. I really thought the showrunners would cruelly make Jon leave for the tropics by the time Sansa got there, but I’m glad they didn’t. Sansa has had one of the most intense character arcs of anyone on Game of Thrones. And the fires she’s walked through have forged her, like Valyrian steel, into something strong that can cut through ice like butter. Reading Ramsay Bolton’s “Dear Traitor and Bastard Jon” letter aloud is nothing to Sansa; she’s suffered his attentions in person and knows he means everything he threatens.

We know this too. So why did the show waste an entire scene on the pointless gore of Ramsay murdering Osha — a minor character whose death carries little dramatic heft because she hasn’t appeared onscreen for years? And am I the only one who felt Iwan Rheon should maybe have taken some paring-knife lessons before demonstrating Ramsay’s mad flaying skillz? He wasn’t very good at peeling apples. I’m still holding out hope that the Smalljon is tricking Ramsay and plans to turn against him. But even if the Umbers are now fighting for the Boltons, there are still other Stark-loyal families of the north. I’d love to see Maege Mormont the She-Bear (sister of ex-Night’s Watch Lord Commander Jeor Mormont and aunt of Ser Jorah) enter battle. But I guess Game of Thrones is using Brienne as its stand-in for awesome female warriors — how great is the audacity with which she informs Ser Davos and Melisandre that she personally slew Stannis? Speaking of the Maid of Tarth, the show has long piloted a Brienne/Jaime ship, but it now looks like there’s a new vessel at the dock: Brienne/Tormund. I am all for a fire-kissed wildling who’s keen to head south. But Sansa and Jon don’t yet know they have a new source of military strength: the oft-praised but not yet deployed Knights of the Vale. At the Eyrie, Lord Robin Arryn has gotten no better at military pursuits since we saw him last season swinging a sword “like a girl with palsy”. Lord Royce seems unflustered by this, since Robin himself will never have to go near a battle… until Littlefinger rocks up bearing a rad gyrfalcon and the threat of the Moon Door.

Would Robin have been less of a dingbat if he’d had a sister to diffuse his mother’s obsessive love? He certainly didn’t cope well with his cousin Sansa’s arrival. (Between him and Ramsay, Game of Thrones makes an excellent case against only children). In any case, Littlefinger’s long game is proceeding nicely. What’s Tyrion’s long game, though? His decision to meet with the Masters of Slaver’s Bay and Volantis has alienated not just the freed Meereenese, but also his own allies Missandei and Grey Worm (whose increasingly proficient command of the Common Tongue perhaps reflects some diligent, hands-on study with Missandei). However, did you notice that one of the courtesans Tyrion left with the Masters was Vala, the former Son of the Harpy assassin whom Varys was genially bribing last episode? What if those three women are going to kill the Masters behind closed doors — an act Tyrion can then blame on the insurgents? That would certainly get the Masters to withdraw their support for the Sons of the Harpy pretty fast. Since this episode is about women taking the initiative, let’s briefly mention some of the Missandei conspiracy theories. One is that she herself is a Son of the Harpy — a double agent set to wrest control of Meereen from Daenerys. Another is that she’s a Faceless Man sent to murder Daenerys — which explains why she knows so many languages. Even if she’s neither, she is tired of being condescended to by foreigners. Which brings us back to Dany herself, against a backdrop of flames. She now has the strength of the Dothraki horde… but what will she do with it? Leave more political chaos in her wake? Go back to Meereen and put her house in order? Or pursue Khal Drogo’s original commitment and head home to Westeros?

Keisha Castle Hughes TBT

'Game of Thrones' Recap: The Snake, the Crown and the Cross

Jon Snow may be back, but the kill-'em-all-and-let-the-Gods-sort-them-out game remains the same......

Jon Snow returned not with a bang, but a whimper. Resurrected last week after his murder by mutinying members of the Night's Watch — not to mention a year of furious speculation by the audience and half-hearted denials by the cast and crew — the Lord Commander reentered the land of the living less like a triumphant messiah and more like a guy who'd just come to after a horrendous car accident. His breath came in gasps. His eyes were wide with confusion and distress. When he stepped off the slab, he couldn’t even walk without an almost equally stunned Ser Davos holding him up. And what did he learn on the other side? As the saying goes, he knows nothing. His rebirth was basically one big supernatural panic attack.

With this scene, tonight's episode — "Oathbreaker" — set its tone early. Coming back from the dead guaranteed Jon no more sense of purpose, let alone success in achieving it, than Daenerys' dragons gave the Targaryen queen a route to the Iron Throne. Fantasy may be a much larger factor in the show than it was when it first started, but its magic is still a very messy business — and the stuff that isn't magical is often even worse. The unhappy fate of Rickon Stark and his wildling companion Osha illustrates the point all too clearly. Book-readers haven't lacked for departures from the source material to shock and dismay them since way back in Season One. But the severed head of the lord's direwolf, presented as proof of heritage to a smirking Ramsay Bolton, is one of the most discomfiting differences from page to screen yet. Here's where the Bastard of Bolton's well-earned track record of brutality pays off: You don't need to do anything to communicate the danger the boy and his friend are in beyond simply placing them in this psychopath's presence. Considering how long it's been since we’ve seen them — nearly two full seasons — it's a genuinely heartbreaking homecoming. Rickon was far from the only young aristocrat to make what was, in retrospect, a terrible decision. Cersei, her brother Jaime, and her zombie killing machine Ser Gregor Clegane scare small children and annoy the Small Council; the siblings' son, King Tommen, seeks out the High Sparrow to demand that his mom be granted access to his late sister's tomb. It does the heart good to see the kid standing up for his family, even one as shitty as the Lannisters, but he makes the rookie mistake of listening to what the old man has to say. Once he has his foot in the proverbial door, the kindly fanatic quickly defuses the situation, feigning infirmity and blowing smoke up the monarch's ass regarding the Queen Mother's near-otherworldly level of devotion to him.

Actor Dean-Charles Chapman aces the assignment of playing a ruler who knows what he’s supposed to do but lacks the experience to do it right; there's shades of Emilia Clarke's Daenerys in his uncertain handling of adversity, a comparison enhanced by the Breaker of Chains' own encounter with a belief system being used to imprison her elsewhere in the episode. (All hail the royal Dothraki widows called the Dosh Khaleen.) The scene also reads as a mirror image of Varys' canny interrogation of an enemy agent in Meereen, in which the spymaster also plays on the love between parent and child to get what he wants. Echoes like these add intricacy to a show too often discussed in terms of sheer shock and awe. And if it's intricate you want, dig the editing in Arya's portion of the episode, which takes a concept as hoary as the training montage and turns it into something visually complex and emotionally riveting. Still blind, the Stark girl endures both beatings and questioning at the hands of the Waif, her cruel tutor in the ways of the Faceless Men, and its unclear which is more painful. Their back-and-forth digs out deeply buried feelings in the trainee: She considers Jon a real brother despite his bastard status, and she'd actually decided to spare her old running buddy the Hound from death before circumstances necessitated a Plan B. Coming to terms with this stuff appears to have played a big a part in her mentor Jaqen H'ghar's decision to restore her eyesight as her newfound Daredevil-style ability to fight blind did.

In his own way, her brother Bran is also learning to see truths that were perhaps better left hidden. With the Three-Eyed Raven by his side, he journeys back in time to the last battle of Robert's Rebellion, in which his father Ned Stark and his friend Meera's dad, Howland Reed, defeated the brilliant swordsman Ser Arthur Dayne with a stab in the back. On one level, this punctures the heroic myth the boy had believed regarding Dad's defeat of a formidable opponent. And in pure plot terms, the vision gave a tantalizing hint as to the fate of Lyanna Stark, the source of the post-fight scream we hear. But this wasn't an entirely pessimistic episode, even if it ended with Jon walking away from the Night's Watch after hanging his betrayers, including the young Olly, in graphic fashion. The most uplifting note wasn't Gilly carrying on like a giddy tourist, or Tyrion's Larry David–level awkwardness at making small talk with Grey Worm and Missandei, or even the fact that mad scientist Qyburn didn’t poison those adorable kids. (Children acting cute without getting murdered: Is this a Game of Thrones first?) It was a major-key variation of the series' theme song, soundtracking Lord Snow's first appearance before the Watch and the wildlings since his revival — a sonic cue that's so important it requires the familiar opening fanfare to accompany it. Sit tight through the misery, folks: There's Snow in the forecast.

Happy Friday the 13th from Keisha Castle-Hughes World

IT'S FRIDAY THE 13TH! GOOD LUCK!!

Keisha Castle-Hughes hits the road in new US sitcom

Keisha Castle-Hughes' next role on American TV screens has been revealed.

Keisha Castle-Hughes, last seen weilding a spear on HBO hit Game of Thrones, can briefly be seen in the trailer for Cameron Crowe's new sitcom Roadies. Set to air in June in the US, Roadies follows the behind-the-scenes dramas of the crew working for a successful rock band. According to E!, Castle-Hughes plays the the band's outspoken sound mixer Donna. The series also stars Luke Wilson, Imogen Poots, Rafe Spall, Peter Cambor and Carla Gugino. Crowe is known for hit films like Jerry Maguire and Almost Famous, but his more recent offerings like We Bought a Zoo and Aloha have been less well received.

Happy Derby Day from Keisha Castle-Hughes World

Game of Thrones recap: Is Jon Snow back?

So now we know. Supposedly. The fate of Jon Snow was revealed in the second episode of Game of Throne's sixth season on Monday afternoon New Zealand time. Though that was far from all that happened. Unfortunately, events elsewhere meant no screen time for either Kiwi actor, Keisha Castle-Hughes and Joe Naufahu.

OK, Jon Snow is breathing. Well, he had one inhalation and then it cut to the credits. Hopefully, he will exhale in the next episode. As everyone assumes he's alone and wanders off, something unexpected happens. It's Melisandre who brings him back, much to everyone's shock.

Melisandre, aka the Red Woman, has a red hot go at bringing Jon Snow back to life.

Mance Rayder is back at Castle Black.

Apparently she'd never done a resurrection before but there's more to her than meets the eye, regardless of whether she's wearing that necklace or not. By the way, Alliser Thorne and his merry band of traitors have been overwhelmed, as Edd returns with the Wildlings and easily recaptures Castle Black. They didn't even need Jon Snow. So what exactly is he back for?

"I am Lord Bolton"

In Winterfell, things have seriously escalated. Lady Walda gives birth to a boy, one which would eclipse Ramsay Snow as heir to his father's throne. You can feel the tension in the air as the two exchange the most awkward father-son pleasantries possible. Seconds later, we find out why. Ramsay kills his father Roose, then leads Lady Walda and the baby to the kennels. Is Ramsay psycho enough to kill a newborn? Yes. Yes he is. Will there again be calls that Game of Thrones has gone too far? Probably. Ramsay is now the undisputed ruler in the north. Not good news for anybody. Including Jon Snow, who Ramsay had earlier suggested killing if Sansa was at Castle Black. Please not again. Speaking of Sansa and friends, they don't achieve much in this episode, but it is confirmed they're headed for Castle Black. But not with Theon Greyjoy (aka Reek). He's pretty down himself for all the horrible things he did to Sansa's family, as he should be, and wants to go back to the Iron Islands. Where things have also escalated. King Balon Greyjoy is now dead. Thrown from a bridge by, according to the internet, his brother Euron, thought to be long dead. He's looking very young though and proclaims himself God. He then presumably disappears as nobody has any idea how Balon died at the funeral. Very intriguing. How will Theon fit in there if he goes back? Alfie Allen has plenty of screen time in this season's promotion so it appears he's got a big part to play. One more thing from the North. Bran's back. As we saw from the photos, he's all grown up. He appears to be in training with the three-eyed raven. He's having some serious Harry Potter-pensive-style flashbacks to a much happier Winterfell, where we see his father Ned, Uncle Benjen and Auntie Lyanna, but most importantly, Hodor can talk! And he's called, for some reason, Willis. In the present day, Hodor can still only say his name and Bran is still paralysed. This scene doesn't reveal much about what will happen with Bran, but it's good to have him back, after a season-long absence.

Family ties

In Kings Landing, it's another episode of more talk than action. This doesn't apply to the Mountain, who appears to be wandering the capital randomly murdering peasants who disrespect his master, Cercei Lannister. At least he's having fun. Cercei and Tommen make up after the young king doesn't allow her to see Myrcella's body. For some reason the adolescent seems stressed about having to run just seven kingdoms. Meanwhile, Jamie and the High Sparrow have a bit of an argument about who's in charge. Jaime looks ready to slay the old man, when the Faith Militant appear out of nowhere. The High Sparrow claims his followers are all poor and powerless, but together they can overthrow an empire. He's like a demented Bernie Sanders. Jaime clearly isn't feeling the Bern and backs off for now. The tensions in that city are sure to explode soon.

"Don't eat the help"

Across the narrow sea, Tyrion fancies himself as a dragon tamer. Neither locked-up beast is eating and Tyrion attempts to get on their good side by revealing how much he wanted a dragon as a boy. Was this the only reason Tyrion came to Esteros, to fulfil his childhood dream? A childhood dream that could overthrow an empire, mind you. My animal-loving side always feels so sorry for those dragons, all locked up down there. Finally, we briefly check in on Arya in Bravoos. She gets beaten up and taunted by that girl and Jaqen H'ghar but there's much expectation for her to do something important. It looks like she's going to be stuck as a sub-plot forever. Although it does appear her days as a beggar are over. It's relentless action in just the second episode of the season. For the past two years, the show has been accused of dawdling on a plot on stretching it too thin before anything of spectacular worth actually happens. But, no one can't say the same thing about this season. Though Jon Snow's return was predictable and expected, it would still be intriguing to see what journey awaits the resurrected one. Hopefully the writers will not disappoint and bring on more twist and action galore next week.

Happy Cinco de Mayo from Keisha Castle-Hughes World